Running Late - August 10, 2007

As a general rule, when clients are late for session, I only give them the remaining time left from the 45 minutes they scheduled. More than likely there is someone scheduled after the tardy client and it's not fair to keep that person waiting. In fact, if the first appointment of the day is late and I go over time, the daily schedules are thrown off for another 8 or 9 people. Exceptions always exist however, especially for heroes. A client came in late last week for one of the better reasons I've heard in a long time. Either that or she's a pretty creative liar.

"Dr. Dobrenski, I'm so sorry I'm late," she panted. "I was waiting for the bus, and this business man, probably about 50, approached this 20-something woman right next to me. He was coming on to her pretty strong and she clearly wanted nothing to do with him but he wouldn't let up. After asking for her phone number and being told politely about 50 times that she wasn't interested, she finally said 'fuck off, jerk!' A lot of people heard it and started laughing. "

"The guy looked mortified, and he poured his soda all over this woman's head! And then just started to walk away. So she runs after him and shoves him in the back. He turns, grabs her arm, and swings her into the back of a cab. She hit the bumper pretty hard and landed on the ground sobbing. It was horrible. When the guy realized that she might be hurt, he started to walk away, fast enough to get the hell out of there, but still slow enough to try to not draw attention. But there were people everywhere. Some just stared, a couple of people helped pick up the woman and started comforting her, but I screamed 'I'm gonna fucking kill you asshole!' and started running after him."

"When the guy sees me running toward him, he breaks out in an all-out sprint down the street, me tailing behind. Other people started up behind me and we basically formed this lynch mob chasing the guy up 3rd Avenue. He was in a suit with his laptop and briefcase, so the extra weight eventually slowed him down. I caught up to him after about 10 blocks, grabbed him his collar, and dragged him down to the ground. The mob formed a circle around him so he couldn't get away again. When he got up, I kicked him in the balls as hard as I could. I'm sorry, can I say 'balls' in here?"

"Of course you may, this is your private sanctuary." I wasn't sure if I was going to get to speak much this session, so I needed my few words to be profound.

"Anyway, so the guy collapsed to the ground, holding his crotch, now just a pathetic ball of Armani and sweat. Everyone started to cheer and two men hoisted me up on their shoulders, like I had just won the Super Bowl. They started to carry me to a bar to celebrate when I realized that I needed to be here. So I thanked everyone for their support, gave my card to someone to give to the woman who was hurt in case she wanted to press charges, and here I am. I'm sorry, it won't happen again."

As she told her story, I started to think about 9/11. After the terrorist attacks, I noticed that people were a lot kinder and gentler to each other but, unfortunately, that was temporary. After a few months people went back to being themselves, which sadly was often selfish and mean. But not my client. This woman was a true hero in my eyes, sticking up for that person and putting herself at risk by chasing after the guy. We made up the therapy time by going over for about 20 minutes and I felt great and honored to be helping her.

"Some people are so great, life is great!" I thought as we talked. After the session, I went out into the waiting room to greet the next appointment, a new client. I apologized for being 20 minutes late, beginning to explain that there were special circumstances involved. The guy stood up, tore up the check that I presume was my fee, told me to go fuck myself, and walked out.

Such a strange twist of events, a true buzz kill. It certainly doesn't support the notion that no good deed goes unrewarded. I suppose it could be worse. Imagine how the guy in the Armani suit feels.

Posted by Rob Dobrenski at 3:34 PM

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Comments

Reading that story made me a better person.

Posted by: A.D. at August 10, 2007 10:55 PM

It probably WAS the guy in the Armani suit :-)

Posted by: Adam Saleh at August 11, 2007 01:23 AM

I don't get it. I've never been to therapy, but I'm pretty sure if I was paying someone $150 an hour to talk to me, I'd be pretty pissed off if they turned up 20 minutes late.

And kicking a guy in the balls doesn't strike me as exactly heroic at the best of times, let alone when you've got an entire angry mob at your back.

Posted by: Simon at August 11, 2007 02:02 PM

Why didn't ya finish with, "No good deed goes unpunished."? Really cool story : )

Posted by: Wayland at August 11, 2007 02:39 PM

Well, Simon. That's because you're the type (like the man in the story) who wouldn't bother to listen to the reason behind the 20 minutes late, and you'd react rather than thinking about it and letting the therapist have his say.

And also, the fact that a WOMAN chased down a MAN who had done absolutely nothing wrong to her, and was doing it because this MAN had not only spilled a drink on another WOMAN for refusing his advances, and then when the WOMAN reacted, acted violently in turn... Well, hopefully the fucker cups his balls and thinks about what they've been through the next time he considers throwing a woman around.

Posted by: Jason at August 12, 2007 11:43 PM

Too funny! I'd write more, but I have to go to my own "private sanctuary". Don't want to be late!!

Posted by: Ladybug at August 15, 2007 10:38 PM

I'm going to have to side with Adam Smith here. I find it difficult to see how anything this woman does could be seen as heroic. Usually the person standing up to the mob or at the very least not doing the same thing everyone else is doing would be the hero. Now that guy was an asshole, but then no one was really right in that situation.
Let's see, the woman technically assaulted the man by shoving him, and he could have fallen and gotten busted pretty bad. The man reacted instinctively, in violence. Not a good decision, but again no one is right here.
And then the, as Jason says, WOMAN - who is a hero because of her gender alone in this separate-but-equal society, has an entire crowd with her and attacks an exhausted, running man probably twice her age. How is she a hero again?
And, more importantly, why would you cave just to hear this story? I mean, reschedule her, etc. but don't make everyone else late just because she did something your average WOMAN (all caps, of course) would do.

Posted by: Doubt Fish at August 19, 2007 07:54 PM

Actually, the guy assaulted her first by pouring soda on her head. There was assault by both parties, but he initiated it.

Posted by: Tech Hell at August 21, 2007 10:54 AM

DoubtFish, do you know any women? I ask because 'your average WOMAN' sure as hell wouldn't do what she did. More to the point, how is assaulting a woman by pouring a soda on her head for rejecting his sexual advances 'acting instinctively'? Maybe the woman should've reacted in a more reasonable manner by NOT kicking the man in the balls but, there certainly is an 'eye for an eye' satisfaction in it.

Posted by: Anonymous at August 21, 2007 11:11 PM

@Tech: How is pouring soda on someone's head assault? And it wasn't exactly unprovoked, she was being obnoxious and cursed at him, who she made quite clear was a complete stranger. And, of course, I doubt the woman would be quite so brave if he actually stood his ground. Basically, her assault consisted of aiming for the opponent's genitalia.
I'm no martial-artist, but I don't know many combat forms whose fundamental purpose is assaulting the opponent's genitals. Vitals, perhaps, but then she kind of falls into the stereotype held for many feminists and such with her... unique form of justice. And, of course, she isn't exactly an inspiration to us all, with her unprovoked assault at an older man whom may or may not have been armed and such.
And, of course, if you're a dick or a cunt, people just won't like you and do things like pour soda on you. Resorting to violence, especially against someone who obviously can kick your ass and leave you crying like a child, is hardly an intelligible solution.

Posted by: Doubt Fish at August 22, 2007 04:34 AM

Doubt Fish, you also have to think, the man kept pressing the situation. When someone, male or female says no, they mean no. And much like her, I'm sure if you were repetitively pressured in a situation like that you would eventually snap and slip out a few foul words. Considering you feel that the woman is a "cunt" for reacting the way she did, I would put money on you saying you would snap.

Posted by: Ninja at August 26, 2007 01:58 AM